ME AND MY BODY:
All of my muscles have completely turned to mush…pudding…jello. Everything is so squishy and ewww. Its the progesterone from pregnancy and breastfeeding that just... destroys muscles and the ability to make them. But I’m REALLY going to make an effort to begin working out... starting today. I gotta at least balance the scales so I don’t turn into the liquid version of Alex Mac by end of summer. It’s time to fight the pooch, wiggle the jiggle and…just try and make it harder for Killian to grab my skin like I’m a body of handles to pull up on.
I can’t believe we’re coming up on 8 months of breastfeeding. My nipples are gladiators…
I think K might be starting to drink less. Between lunch, dinner and the occasional veggie poof or frozen mango, my boobs have definitely gotten a mid day break lately. Tell you what? This whole food introduction process is crazy. Right now he’s only eating organic fruits and veggies…but as we brave into the outside world I can’t help but be like Ahhhhhhhhhh No GMO, No hormones, No Sugar, No NOTHING. Like he’s this perfect clean slate and I’m petrified to put something in his body that’ll contaminate it. I know that’s delusional and 2 years from now he’ll probably be shoving a cupcake down his throat and sucking on lollipops, but what can I say? The new mom crunchy struggle is real.
Here's me breastfeeding in the back seat right before Anthony's Oath Ceremony, because I didn't fancy 10,000 people gawking at the girls.
K had some chompers come through a couple weeks ago that had me so sleep deprived I mistook Prep H for toothpaste.... but who hasn’t done that once or twice?
The longer I ride this “mom train” the more confident I get in my decisions. Not that my decisions are more right than another moms…but that my decisions are right for K. The day he was born, I insisted that after 7PM all lights be off and no one speak...and he's never confused day with night. At 4 weeks, I’d fully transitioned K to his room for bed time...and he's never had problems sleeping in his crib. At 6 weeks, we started a bedtime routine...and his sleep stretches got longer and he fell asleep quicker. Around 3 months, I let him CIO a few times...and he learned to fall asleep on his own. This might seem weird or harsh to other mom’s, but K is like me…he likes his space at night. Like sometimes I try and sneak in cuddles during a 3AM feeding, but he will toss and turn in my arms until I put him back in his crib. He’s never been a snuggler and refuses to fall asleep on me. He’s just not that kid. But know what he is? He’s a kid who sleeps through the night. He’s a kid who I put down for naps now…and he rolls over and goes to sleep.
HIGHLIGHT OF THE WEEK:
Grandma and Colonel came to visit and gave Anthony and I our first date since Killian was born. Leaving Killian and skipping his first bedtime routine EVER was hard. But knowing he was with the greatest mom ever made it easier. It was like she was reading my mind or something. Just as I was about to call, check in or freak out ....a new picture or video would arrive. Gah mom’s are awesome.
Going on a date though, was weird. We did dinner and a paint night, but I found it hard to “turn off”. Not sure how to explain it really. Just felt like K was still there and I needed to be paying attention to him. I literately had no clue what to do with the silence. I've been "on" for 8 months...and I didn't know what to do with myself without him there.
Took exactly 2 glasses of wine for me to start to relax.
Even then Anthony and I were just sat there …eating cheese fondue like we had a million times before, this time was different. Well actually everything was exactly the same, but we were different. We were out for dinner for the first time since becoming parents and it felt like everyone around us should know that…lol But no one did...and no one cared. We'd just emerged from the hardest bootcamp of our lives changed people. You don't realize until you step away.
It was very surreal. Like I was looking through the world with new lenses...mom goggles. I saw all the babies in strollers and wondered how old they were...and saw toddlers running around. Other people's kids were no longer an annoyance to me. Might've been the first time in a long time I actually looked at my husband. Like looked at his face instead of just acknowledging his presence lol Anyways I had wine and apple pie for dinner and it was delicious.
LOW POINT OF THE WEEK:
So K has this thing where he’s a complete asshole when you try and change his diaper. Going on 3 weeks now…he just rolls over and tries to crawl away. You’d think the buckle on the changing table would help, right? Nope…he’ll flip it over on his back like a ninja turtle wearing a half shell and keep crawling away. Then there’s the kicking and flailing and OMG kid…we’ve been doing this dance for 8 months…how do you not understand the concept of “you’re making this 10 times longer by fighting it.” Anyways, my genius way to remedy this…is the art of distraction. So every 2-3 days I grab a random object and give it to him. It fascinates him long enough to wipe his ass and do my thing. Well I grabbed a small box that his baby tylenol had come in and handed it to him. I finished changing his diaper, picked him up and went to grab my lunch. What safer place is my baby, than in my arms right? With K in one arm, my lunch in the other…K drops the box he had still been playing with. I’m all “I’ll get that later”. I bring him into the family room and he’s playing on the ground and I’m watching him as I eat on the couch. Real classy up in the Lavin household.
Then out of nowhere K starts coughing, which he never coughs. He keeps coughing and he looks a little red so I walk over to him and he seems like he’s choking on something. I have never been that scared in all of my life. I do a firm pat on the back and HACKKKK a piece of cardboard shoots out of his mouth. No words. My son was choking on a piece of the Tylenol box he apparently chewed off WHILE I WAS HOLDING HIM IN MY ARMS! I went from being scared to feeling like the biggest piece of shit in the universe. How did he chew part of the box off? How did I not see that? What if he had died? I’d be the mother who lost her kid because she gave him a box so he wouldn’t flail during a diaper change? Uhhh…mom guilt is the worst. Needlesstosay, I’ve learned my lesson but also developed a profound fear of looking away for a second and something terrible happening. I’m not built to love someone this much.
It’s so awesome being his mom. Like every day I see his personality developing. I watch him struggle, make choices, push his limits, test his balance…and I’m just like…”I made that...good work KQ”. Sometimes we’ll sit there for 30 minutes just laughing…why? who knows…he laughs and then I laugh…and we just keep laughing at each other. The older he gets, the more interesting this mom stuff gets.
NEW THINGS - Sooooooo many new things
*Crawling at the speed of light
*Pulling up on the couch, the walls, the windows, the dogs, the dog door, my breasts
*Walking while holding onto the couch
*Eating veggie poofs and pumpkin apple finger foods...and cardboard apparently :/
*Top two teeth
*18 month onesies (which basically means no more onesies) and 2T shirts. The 1T's are too short and K has a long torso lol Size 4 diapers, Size 5 for nighttime #beastmode
*Signs “milk” ...he understands diaper, potty, food, and up, but doesn't sign them back. Don't think he understands the rest. That or he doesn't care about them. I refuse to teach him "more" I heard they just do it all the time once they figure it out lol
*Waves hello. He can't help himself. My dad kept saying "HI" and even when K was fussy he'd wave back with his sad lip. hahaha it's compulsive at this point.
*Stands up in the bath. Going on 3 weeks of this shit lol He will not sit down. So…he wades his feet in warm water while I sponge bathe him. Hoping this is a phase.
*Sadly we had to retire the Pack ’n Play. Once they’re mobile…they can’t be contained. Well…they can…but they scream so loud you lose that battle.
*The bouncer is on its way out too :/ I can put him in it here and there, but he just wants to crawl around terrorizing everyone and everything. You think your house is baby proofed…but you’re wrong. Where there’s a will…there’s a way for them to turn a pillow into a machete…i promise you.
*Developed a new emotion “scared”. This was discovered when I drove a remote control car towards him…and then again with his favorite ball. Basically, if you’re electronic and make a b-line to my son…he will cry, scream and crawl away in hysterics. And it’s hilarious #badmom #butitssofunny
*He loves crawling to the dog's water bowl and flipping it over and drenching my entire floor. He just LOVES doing that. That and a bunch of other things I don't want him doing, like playing with the dog door, letting the dogs in the house via sliding door and spitting up on my phone. He's hilarious like that.
First He Was Embarassed
But Then He Posed...lol
QUESTIONS FOR YOU GUYS:
- When will he be into books and stop trying to rip the pages and eat the corners?
- Anyone else have a kid that stands in the bath or is K the only weirdo?
- When do I get my period again? I mean I’m not complaining…just curious
- Is there an actual way to teach your baby to not grab the dog’s tail or paws?
THINGS I’M USING:
*B.eautifloor - $24.99 at Target. I got 3 packs and covered my entire floor. Way too many tumbles. K thinks he can walk, which he can’t. Also his knees were getting bruised from the hardwood floors so….
*Spot X Hard Stain/Spot Remover - My glass shower has had the WORST water marks on it since we moved in. I tried every Pinterest remedy and have been convinced it was permanent. Then trusty Amazon suggests this product. It works. Its awesome.
*After 10 years…we got a new mattress. There’s so many mattresses out there and they’re so expensive and it’s like…how do you choose? All I know was I was tired of sleeping in a cesspool. After some internet research I found an amazing mattress from Tuft & Needle. We got a King ….for only $750 and it was delivered within a few days…in a box. If you haven’t changed your mattress in a long time…do it. Honestly my back and my jaw feel like 4000% better. What a difference. It’s a firm bed, which is what I like. It cheap, awesome AND if you have 100 sleeps to return it if you change your mind. If you like softer mattresses, I heard Casper is a good alternative. Slightly more expensive though..
*Munchkin Miracle 360 Trainer Cup - amazing…doesn’t spill and water comes out wherever he sucks from. genius.